Daring To Be Totally Yourself

“Every time you are tempted to react in the same old way,
ask if you want to be a prisoner of the past or a pioneer of the future.” 
~Deepak Chopra

What does it really take to live from your authentic self? What does it take to dare to be who you are?

There’s nothing more attractive and inviting than someone who is confident in who they are and what they believe in.

Oladimeji Odunsi from Unsplash

There’s an elegance and ease about them. Better yet, when you can live that way, you can share that enthusiasm with others and life is more fulfilling.

Contrary to that is someone who doesn’t know him or herself well, someone who depends on other people’s opinions for validity, or self-worth and their identity. These types of people are unsure of their values and purpose.

If you have no idea who you are, it can be confusing and painful. With lots of judgment, denial, hiding-out and defending of yourself.

Can you identify with these situations?

The biggest problems arise when you look outside of yourself for gratification, praise, and identity. Everyone wants to feel good about themselves, and have deep, meaningful relationships and a purposeful life.

However, if you don’t really know yourself, it’s impossible for others to know you, or for you to know your true purpose.

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Letting Go Of The Past

I can totally relate to both of these scenarios. For most of my early life (birth-30) I was a very shy, quiet, young woman who did not speak up and sat in the back of the room in school. I was terrified of being seen and having to open up to and speak about myself. This was distressing for me when I was accepted to nursing school and was constantly being required to speak up and be seen.

I had no idea who I was. I was like a chameleon. I could change and adapt to whatever situation I found myself in. Being a quick adapter, was a survival skill that served me well to deal with the chaos and trauma of living in a home with an alcoholic father who died when I was 7 and a depressed mother.

Brene’ Brown author of Rising Strong says “when we deny our stories, they define us.” When we own our stories, we get to write a brave new ending. 

Finally, after years of sadness, depression, and self-denial of who I was. I decided to change my life and own my story. It took courage, faith and deep soul work to believe in myself and to choose to live the life God had given me and the life I really wanted to live. A life with purpose and meaning.

I had to be willing to let go of the woman I was to be the woman I was becoming.

The major key to self-love and joy is to know yourself at your deepest level of being and to remember your true spiritual, multidimensional nature.

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This leads to a certain steadiness in life. Unlike being dependent on outside influences, you’re guided by your inner truth. This gives you strength for all that life has to offer. You’re able to be present, live with passion, and more fully experience the whole spectrum of emotions, from great joy to great sorrow, and still remain at peace.

Are you ready to be who you really are?

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Here are four ways to honor yourself and embrace the power of being you. As you start to adopt them in your life, notice how your view of yourself and the world become brighter, more meaningful, and more mystical.

  1. Deepen your spiritual practice. A spiritual practice means taking time to look inward and experience your true nature. Examples of spiritual practices are meditation, prayer, yoga, being in nature, doing something you love, engaging in an art project, sitting in silence, or even immersing yourself in sound. It can be anything that inspires you to be, observe love, and feel.
  2. Be willing to dig deep into your beliefs and self-sabotaging behavior and emotions. Become aware of the recurrent thoughts about which you often think. Note how often you rehash a conversation that took place weeks or even years ago, or how often you imagine negative, fearful outcomes.
  3. Know and live your values and purpose. Take the time to determine clearly what you believe to be your most important values. What MUST be present in your life for you to feel good? Write 3 to 5 of them down and why they are important to you. Then, start to observe your thoughts. Take note of how you make decisions and take actions that are congruent with your values. Make your values your guide to action.
  4. Use your unique gifts and talents to help others. We are all one and at the same time each individual is unique and has a specific place in the universe. You have been given talents and skills that are unique to your journey, but you must relate to others to survive and thrive. When you clear your own misunderstanding about the truth of your existence, everyone benefits. you help us all.

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Marianne Williamson in her book A Return to Love. Says,  “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.”